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What it’s like to live inside my head

I have many random thoughts every day. Today’s include the following:

  • How many times a day do you think the people at chik-fil-a say ‘my pleasure’? Do they say it when they go home or out with their friends? I bet it’s stuck in their heads and at Thanksgiving dinner with their families. When someone says pass the mashed potatoes I bet they say ‘my pleasure’ out of habit. 
  • I run my ceiling fan every day. How does the dang thing get dusty all the time? Seriously, it’s ALWAYS moving. 
  • Looking at the lights of town tonight I wondered what the eclectic bill for this city is. I mean I know what mine is, and I wonder if you added every home, street light, and business what the total would be on electricity for the month. Then add every other city in America. Man, I bet it’s more than I could even imagine. 
    • While trying to train my puppy and retrain my older dog I wondered how smart dogs really are. I taught a 14 week old puppy to sit in like half an hour, and then he looked at me like what next lady? I live in a home with two dogs, and I feel like I’m the dumbest one here. Lord help me.
    • There are usually a lot of Chuck Norris jokes, one liners, and a lot of thanking Jesus for caffeine mixed in there as well. My mind is an interesting place to be I assure you. Leave me some comments of the things you wonder about so l don’t feel so crazy. That is all.
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    Things I Suck At

    Here’s to making you feel better about yourself by telling you some things I suck at.

    Hanging pictures. Heaven help me they are never level, and I use thumb tacks to hang everything because I have been known to move nails around a lot which creates holes which I have learned are pretty hard to fill and cover exactly right. 

    Waking up early. I am not a morning person, but I’m not a night person either. I’m pretty much at my prime for the day between 10am (after 2 cups of coffee) and 5pm (after a late afternoon coffee). I set 5 alarms every morning because I usually hit snooze on the first two or three. My body just freaks out if I don’t get a full 9 to 10 hours of sleep at night. 

    Buying Christmas cards. For those of you that don’t know I have secretly convinced my mom the last several years to pick me up some Christmas cards. When she received a card from me the first year that she had bought it didn’t go over well haha. Somehow it happened again the next year, and we just decided to make it a tradition. 

    Watering plants. I’m more of a cactus as a house plant type girl. If a plant requires watering several times a week its not going to last very long in my care. Its not that I forget its just that I don’t want to, so I put it off until the next day and the next day until the sad little plant dies. Tips: succulents are great for people like me. 

    Laundry. What’s a delicate cycle and what counts as delicate clothes? If a shirt can’t be washed with blue jeans I don’t need the shirt. If a pair of underwear can’t be washed with towels and socks then count me out. I never separate anything which I know will make some people cringe, but at least I’m honest. This is also the reason my socks NEVER match. Ever. I can’t be bothered to keep two socks together for years. I don’t want that kind of responsibility, and I never agreed to that type of commitment.

    Cooking more than one thing at a time. I believe that the women that can have a seven course meal ready to serve and have everything perfectly warm or chilled have sold their souls to the devil. Its like an evil trick that makes the rest of us feel under accomplished. Warning: If you get lucky enough for me to cook for you either one portion of the meal will be cold or burnt. I once threw away half a loaf of bread trying to make BLTs because I couldn’t cook bacon and toast bread at the same time. That’s real life y’all. 

    I hope this post helps you feel a little better about yourself. Just smile and remember: everybody sucks at something. Some people just aren’t honest enough to admit it. 

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    Introducing Charley 

    For those that didn’t know…. I got a puppy. He is also a cocker spaniel. I guess I’m pretty bias to the breed now. As much as I wanted to rescue and adopt I chose to purchase Charley instead. I am all for adoption, but when you want a specific breed sometimes that’s hard to find. This little guy needed a home though, and Noah needed a brother. I am probably more excited than Noah though. 

    For those of you thinking of getting a puppy let me remind you that puppies are a HUGE responsibility. I have had a smile on my face since I picked this guy up. He has given me so many laughs. Puppies are uncoordinated, clumsy, playful, and hilarious. They also poop in the floor, whine, chew everything, and wake you up early. 

    Having two dogs has been a learning experience for me. I’ve never had two dogs of my own so this is uncharted teritory. Do you let them fight over toys? Do you look the other way when they do the whole ‘humping for dominance’ thing?  (yes, despite what anyone tells you that is a thing, and it’s terrible) How do you make sure they both get enough attention? You may think oh, they’re just dogs, but I love animals and want the animals I take responsibility for to have the best life possible. 

    Charley has been here a full week now, and we are all still adjusting. Sorry I haven’t posted in a while, but as you can see I’ve been preoccupied. I have some new posts coming soon though so stay tuned for those and updates on Charley and Noah.